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The Sanctuary: G to S

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Our middle room contains some catchphrases that were once big stars. Who could forget the might of "Hiya Mark" for example?

Get To Bed!

Shouted by Lard, like so many catchphrases, it was tossed around on the Graveyard Shift for years, cos it was late and people should be in bed, and not listening to two northern tossers on the wireless. Honest. Get To Bed later had a 'time change' operation and settled into the short lived Breakfast Show as Get Out Of Bed. It soon married Get To Work and the duo had a happy life until they decided to depart the show to explore pastures new. Alas they never worked again and the pair were rescued from near death by the Sanctuary earlier this year.

"He's A Gentleman" "He's A Gentleman of Rock!"

You know it never ceases to amaze me how many famous rock stars that Radcliffe knows, who do really disgusting and horrible things in the evening, and yet go out of their way to put it all right before their cleaner turns up the next morning. Hence they are gentlemen. Gentlemen of Rock.

The Gentleman has now been abandoned, along with its good mate, 'A Gentleman Of Rap'. Both now snuggle together for warmth in our office.

He's a Wind Up, Wind Up... He's a Cheeky Wind Up Scampster and He's on the Radio...

Used for months during the highly original windup slot from Autumn 1999. this critter was an amalgam of two parts - the sung "He's a wind up wind up" and Mark, reciting with glee the rest of the line. However, Mark and Lard's features tend to have an even shorter shelf life than some of their catchphrases. We found this one shivering, cold and lonely, in a gutter. With a pooey bum.

He's Back! He's Back In Denim!

Denim were a rather fantastic band around 1996. They probably still would be if they hadn't split. Mark and Lard however stole their anthem, back in denim, and forced it to perform, under slave like conditions, every time that the duo talked about their new clothes. Funnily enough, Lard's new sarongs, sandals, kilts, and cod-pieces were always made out of the blue stuff...

Hiya Mark!

Well you wouldn't, would you? You wouldn't let a catchphrase abuse you like this one was abused. All it would take was Mark Radcliffe to say somet derogitary, and then Lard would go 'Hiya Mark', cos it was about him. Well in the end, Lard had enough. I'll never understand how cruel some people can be, out out it went. It's with us now. Safe.

Ho Ho Ho, £5

It's amazing how much money was on offer in the Mystery Voice competition isn't it? Mark was astounded, and used to say it like this... The greed finally got this catchphrase as it tried to run off with the money. It was caught and we are now rehabilitating it back into society.

I'm Great, Me

Some would say that Lard is vain and conceited. Not true as this old catchphrase of his clearly proves.

In A Jim MacDonald Styleee

Giving anything out in the area in the style of Emmerdale's finest always was a rare and distinguished honour - it meant more to most people than recieving an MBE from the Queen or listening to a Five record with former members of Queen playing the quitair in the background. Such was the popularity of the Jim MacDonald Stylee that it could have anything it wanted, anything at all. So much so that it did. In an attempt to run off with Lard's missus, the Jim MacDonald Stylee was quickly outlawed in the Summer of 2000, and has been on the run ever since. A sad, sad tale, and now only talked about on dark winters evenings...

Mushn't Gwumble

A popular saying in late 1999-early 2000, this catchphrase was reknowned for Lard saying it, while bringing up severe amounts of flem from the back of the throat. It was Lard's continous throat flem problem, which caused the huge amounts of green mucas that ended up filling the studio by 4pm, that lead to BBC management to outlaw the Gwumble. The humiliation of the duo being impersonated (badly) by Jo Whiley's producer, Ben, didn't help either. Saddend and alone, Mushn't later attempted to commit suicide. His continuing drink problem lead him to be sacked from the show. By Autumn 2000, at the very bottom, he was rescued by us and since being re-united with Gwumble, has started taking tentative steps to recovery.

Musht Gwumble

Brother and sister-in-law of Mushn't Gwumble, this pair mysteriously disappeared after that bizairre attempted murder of their relatives, Mushn't Gwumble... We're currently re-habilitating them back into society...

Must Get Some Oil For The Door!

Errr.... It's going to take some explaining this one... It all involved a door sound effect. And every time the door opened, it screeched. And then they said they had to get some oil for the screeching hinges. Unfortunately, for this little creature, someone finally did...

No Need!

As expected, there is no need for us to explain this catchphrase, nor how it was cruely sacked in the spring of 2000.

On limited edition brown vinyl... not available in the shops... because its f***ing awful

A large family from the Graveyard Shift rejects, these poor mites were used on ads for records. For records so bad they were not available in the shops. So bad, they were only available on brown vinyl. The most famous member of the family included The Tindersticks Party Album. No! No more of Tindersticks singing Russ Abbot's Atmosphere, please!

Oh Dear...

A star on the Graveyard Shift, and occassionally on the Breakfast Show, this little critter came in a live form from Lard, as well as in a jingle by some mysterious bloke whose name time has probably forgotton. We'll forever remember him as 'that bloke who did that jingle' and who gave this little creature it's life for so long...

With a tale like that, we could get on Our Tune with Simon Bates.

Ooh My Life!

To be fair, we in the Sanctuary remember this one, but haven't a clue why on io it was used. Still, we're not perfect. We just give it a good home, along with it's cuddly friend, 'Get back in the knife drawer.'

Post Haste

Used when Lard wanted something done quickly, this catchphrase was rescued with it's brother Meat Paste and Fish Paste. Awhh...

Put a rocket up it

This little one hasn't spoken once since we found it. If you can help us with any info on it, so that we may be able to help, please send us an email.

Rough As A Dog's Arse

And you thought it was a family show... How niave!

Skinning The Competition Alive!

Was this one cruely abandoned because they were no longer skinning the competition alive? Did they decide this was too cruel? We deserve to know...

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