This page is no longer updated

We've left it here for reference. Find Out More.

The Resthome: M to Z

This page is no longer updated and kept here for archive purposes only. Please visit the new Fancy A Brew page for up to date news and information.

This is the new wing, with M-Z in it. These little bundles are in here:

Mark's Television Programme.

Early staple of the afternoon programme, Mark's Television Programme was on the radio.

Although in many ways, just simply a Jerry Springer clone, in others it brought about the unique combination of British stiff-upper-lipness and lots of punching and fighting.

The programme continued for many months, until the costs of post-show healthcare became too much for the broadcaster to bear the burden of.

Match Of The Day.

Much as I always wanted this feature to be Mark and Lard sitting there lighting a match on air ("and todays match Mark, is a Swan Vesta") it wasn't. My idea would probably set the studio smoke detector off as well. Oh well.

This young specimain had a brief but recurring burst in the limelight during Mark and Lard's fill in slots while Breakfast DJ Chris Evans was on holiday, where Mark and Lard would invite someone to propose to someone else, in the hope they'd say "yes". The fact that those taking part always sounded like the same two people, should not perturb anybody.

Relegated to fill in slots, Match of the Day never really got a taste of fame, and only joined us after a business venture selling sandwiches collapsed, leaving it penniless.

Morris Idol.

December 7th, 2001 saw the end of a 3 week attempt to find a troup of morris dancing hopefuls to dance outside the a pub.

Morris Idol however lived in the shadow of it's older popular brother, Pop Idol, which found fame on ITV. It even got good friends, whilst Morris had to make to with the 'Malicious' Mark Radcliffe, 'Bolton Bullfrog' Bernard Wrigley, and the Bard of Barnsley FC, Ian McMillan.

After three weeks of searching for the new stars of the Morris, Mr Idol was ejected from the Radio One studios after a punch up between its friends on air. Credability gone, Morris Idol turned to drink and despite an attempt to sell itself to ITV2, was found near death by the side of the A57 in Glossop. We have been nursing it ever since.

Radio One Antiques Records Roadshow.

Canned in August 2001, the Radio One Antiques Records Roadshow toured the nation, well the canteen of BBC Manchester anyway.

With minimal budget and expertise, it ended up being hosted by antiques expert Mark Radcliffe, who also valued items brought in by vistors, and also showed them the door.

Despite being low budget and low quality it has managed a few series, but reached its demise on August 3rd, 2001 when antiques expert Mark finally got fed up of telling people to 'Back Off The Mic'.

Slipnot's Army.

Never particularly loved by anyone in particular, this little monstrosity was chucked out on 14 March 2002 for a) being unoriginal (too much like a spoof of Dad's Army using Slipnot as the basis of the jokes) and b) having far too much canned laughter in it. We didn't really want to take this one in, but Number 3 came round and threatened to get his sister Dolly to knit us one.

Tony MacCaroll's Classical Gas.

For those of you with short memories, Tony MacCaroll was originally the drummer in Oasis but left at some point, for some reason. Why and when, I don't particularly care but it was some point between 1993 and 1996. I never liked Oasis anyway.

After leaving Oasis, Tony's next project was working with classical music and the Graveyard Shift had the exclusive first play of his work!

Combining classical music with top notch drumming to bring it into a modern style saw Classical Gas reach the dizzy heights of recognition and appreciation, but was sadly halted as a project when Mozart complained.

Vague News.

Good afternoon, this is Martin Henfield at the Vague News Desk. Reports are coming in that a feature, possibly broadcast on the radio, or maybe the television, was abandoned when its presenter asked for more money to keep on doing it.

"I want more money to keep doing it."

Since the demise, the feature has been kept somewhere, possibly a box, awaiting someone to know what to do with it.

Uncle Tony's Catalogue Corner.

There is barely a week that goes by that magazines like the Radio Times don't populate its inards with some Innovations-style catalogue. And when you're on air for several hours a week, features are often hard to come by. But wait, can't we combine these two facts into a whole new feature?

Intermittent feature on the Graveyard Shift, the Calalogue Corner took a wry look at those catalogues who think people really want a book shaped remote control holder.

Sadly it came to an end, not for any reason to do with Tony, but because the catalogues never really seem to come up with anything new...

The Yes/No Game.

Also chucked in the bin that we call life on the 14 March 2002 was the Yes/No game. A highly original concept, contestants had to answer questions without saying yes or no. Highly cheap also, cos no one ever seemed to win. Which begs the question - was it rigged? Well when we took it in, it had a strange suitcase that it hides under the bed in the hostel...

Planet Bods Sites in the network